Letting Go

I take on projects with passion and gusto. This is not as haphazard as it may outwardly seem. I enjoy, as they say, "casting my net in many directions." I meet interesting people and have interesting experiences when I do things this way.

For the past three months, I've kept up with doing this particular project, Across Mediums, even as I discovered that doing it wasn't serving me in the ways that I had hoped it would serve me when I began. I was hoping to have a continuous stream of work and from doing that work, inspiration.

What I found was that life did not always move in the linear way that I had hoped. Sometimes my time was limited, and during those weeks, it was hard to get anything done. When time is limited and then I don't have the opportunity to work on the art that is nearer and dearer to me, it became time to ask myself: Do I want to continue this project for the sake of continuing it, or do I want more authentic creation?

I think that I will keep up with my Across Mediums journal, on my own. And I can see myself at some point making a choice to update here, add more pictures to the flickr account, etc. But creating in this way--having the narrow constrictions of both a deadline and a week to do three projects across three different mediums did not work out as dreamily as I had hoped. Instead of experimenting, and discovering, I have found it to be a process of treading water, trying to stay afloat.

I don't want to live for those reasons.

So I'm letting the updates to this project go, in favor of focusing more on a pace of creating that works better for me. I love that I brainstormed 52 different themes. On days when I'm feeling low in inspiration, it will be a wonderful thing to turn to my AM notebook and pick a theme and just say, "Go."

It will be nice to give myself permission to let something go, without cracking the whip.

Blessings,
Kate